Today I read something really interesting that changed how I saw my relationship to the Spirit. Elder E. Bednar one of the 12 Apostles in our time, said it is not the Holy Spirit that moves away from us when we are partaking in something that offends the Spirit, it is us who move away from the Spirit. We use our agency (free will) to either go towards the Spirit or away from it depending on whether the thing we are doing and going towards has the Spirit or doesn't. It is us who is moving one way or the other.
I have not heard it put that way. For me that feels more empowering, and also puts the responsibility on me. Once we are baptized and confirmed we have the Holy Spirit with us always, it does not go anywhere. But we can move away from it or towards it by the choices we make. The good news is we can come back of course. The bad news is if we get use to living with out the presence of the Holy Spirit, then we don't notice it's absense after awhile. For me I accutely feel when I have moved away from the Spirit. Because it feels sooooo happy, peaceful, amazing to experience the Spirit, like out of a fairy tale, it feels really really bad when I don't feel the Spirit.
When I didn't have the Spirit, I knew I was missing something, I can remember walking around the rooms of other spiritual paths, or churches I belonged to and feeling the hole, feeling the emptiness, but I didn't know what it was I was missing. But now that I have experienced the Spirit and felt the complete relief, joy, peace, indescribable happiness, it feels really awful to not feel the Spirit. Such a horrible, devestating loss feeling. I think it is very important to be clear about what things have the Spirit and what do not. Then we can make good choices to use our agency to go towards the things that help us to experience the Spirit and go away from the things that would take us away from the Spirit. Addictions can be a problem, because they can feel like they have so much control over us.
The more we feed addictions the more they take on a life of their own. They can feel like they have power and control over us. But through Jesus Christ we can take our power back. The more we fill ourselves with the Spirit and do the things the General Authorities have asked us to do, read scripture daily, pray twice a day, move towards the things of the Spirit the more we do have armor against the adversary and the addictions that can take us away down into misery.
I know if we ask for help we get it. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ want nothing more than that we succeed in life, that we are our happiest and highest versions of ourselves. That is why we were given the Holy Spirit to help us as we navigate our way through this life safely and happily. We are meant to live empowered and nothing empowers us more than the Holy Spirit. What a gift! We are so blessed!
I now consciously move towards the things of the Spirit and fill myself up with these things, knowing that I have the freedom to choose the things that keep the presence, power and incredible joy of the Spirit with me!
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